Inside Out Pt. I

5 years Dedicated, 5 years of learning. 5 years of change, as the days went by I saw the change happen. I saw real managers leave; I saw the change with my own eyes. My first day was fairly awkward, I dint expect to hit the floor so quick, no training, no guidance, no one to go to if I had questions, I guess I was not meant to last long. This should have been the first sign that this was going to fall apart quickly. I hit the floor running, but I was desperate. I needed the job, and the pay was decent. It kept my head above water. Not knowing that I would one day bleed the colors of this company and then be kicked to the curve so easily. Discarded with no disregard to what little value I had.

Funny I laugh, I can still replay the days where I no longer wanted to be there, I wanted to run out and inhale freedom, but my bills and duties kept me chained to this misery I called a decent job. Hell. A decent job for most, it was good while it lasted, towards the end I had a lot to complain about even though I shouldn’t have. I had a set schedule where many didn’t. My pay was better than some of the people that were in higher position than me; I knew this because they were colleagues of mine. Associates I started with, people who struggled the same way I did. The same people who saw the change and embraced it, I guess money does go a long way.

I declined these offers to “move up the corporate ladder” as I saw them unfit, and unsound. If I know how to do what you know how to do and it’s a walk in the park, but I see the flaws in what you call “management” why would I restrict myself to “climbing this corporate ladder”?

Lets take a few steps back because I feel like I’m moving to fast for those of you who have no idea what the fuck I’m talking about. If you can read between the lines you can feel my frustration. A frustration that later on digested as an acid that freed me from the shackles of this oppression they call retail. The task of dealing with people and eating their shit. The rules that they don’t read but they try to enforce.

A quick question. Would you call yourself a sensei in a dojo? Would you call yourself a pilot in a descending plane? Would you call yourself a doctor while someone dies? I wouldn’t. Hell why would I? I mean I know the definition of all these terms. There for I would never label myself something that I am not. Would I call myself a manager even though I did not know how to lead? Would I call my self a manger even tough I did not know how to manage? FUCK NO I would not. Why? Because its not as easy as adding that word in front of your name. I can’t look at something and call it gold and boom! Magically it’s gold. It doesn’t work that way. Then why the hell-on gods green earth would they do this? Hey you want an extra 30k in your salary? Shit… I would. Why the fuck not? I’m human, I’m naturally greedy, but that’s beside the point.

You can be a cool person down to earth and have everyone like you, but if you’re not a leader you probably should not be a manager. Now I know what your thinking, what the fuck does this guy know about Leadership? Believe it or not I know a heck of a lot more than those idiots of yours you call bosses, But that my friends, is another conversation for another blog.

This long journey of a rat race I unfortunately participated in, paid my rent, bought me a car and gave me the lavished lifestyle I have today.